Tuesday, December 05, 2017
Monday, December 04, 2017
Saturday, December 02, 2017
Αυτά που μας 'τραβάνε' σε έναν άνθρωπο στην αρχή, πολλές φορές είναι και ο λόγος που τον αφήνουμε κιόλας και αυτό ισχύει και για τα δυο φύλλα. Όταν συστήνεσαι με κάποιον δεν ξέρεις εξ' αρχής που θα καταλήξετε. Ούτε γνωρίζεις το ποιόν του άλλου με το καλημέρα.
Κανένας δεν συστήνεται ως "Είμαι ο Γιώργος και θα τα πηγαίνουμε καλά μέχρι που σε 8 μήνες θα μείνω άνεργος και θα το ρίξω στο ποτό" και καμμία γυναίκα δεν λέει "Είμαι η Ελένη και θα τα φτιάξουμε, θα σου μαγειρευω το αγαπημένο σου φαγητό και θα συζούμε αλλά σε 1 χρόνο θα βαρεθώ και με βρεις με το φίλο σου στο κρεββάτι". Αν γινόταν έτσι τα διαζύγιο θα ήταν ανύπαρκτα.
Επειδή δεν προχώρησε μια σχέση δεν σημαίνει οτι ο ένας εκ των δύο ήταν σκάρτος. Πολύ απλά δεν τα βρίσκουνε. Χωρίστε ήρεμα και πολιτισμένα σαν ενήλικες και μην βρίζεστε γιατί γίνεστε ρεζιλι και οι δύο
κορίτσια,τι λέει;είπατε σήμερα αυτά τα βαθυστόχαστα πως πρέπει να είναι ο σωστός ο άντρας ενώ διαλεγετε τον πιο μαλάκα ή ρεπάρετε;— Jibolba ® (@Victor_Shade_) December 1, 2017
Αφήστε τον μαλάκα και πάρτε σκύλο.— Dirty Diana (@dirtydianaohhhh) November 25, 2017
-Δεν ειρωνευτικα...εκανα καυστικο χιουμορ.— Γκρινιάρης (@NinjetiPants) November 22, 2017
Ντακς. Δεν σε λεω πουτανα αλλα τον μπαιρνεις. #autopsia
Sunday, November 26, 2017
Friday, November 24, 2017
Thursday, November 23, 2017
Tuesday, November 21, 2017
Friday, November 17, 2017
Monday, November 13, 2017
Friday, November 10, 2017
1) Περισσότερα βιβλία αλλά λιγότερη ανάλυση στο καθένα (αντι για 2 μισάωρα και βάλε το καθένα 15 - 20 λεπτά)
2) Ταινίες (κατα προτίμηση στο Netflix που έχουμε συνδρομή για άμεσο gratification)
3) Σειρές (το παραπάνω ισχύει και εδώ)
4) Προτάσεις για ταξίδια εσωτερικού (πχ Bath, Oxford, Edinburgh etc). Τι να δούμε τι μας άρεσε κτλ
5) Kαλά στέκια στο Λονδίνο για φαγητό, περίπατο, μουσείο, ψώνια κτλ
6) Συνεργασίες ενδεχωμένος με άτομα άλλης ηλικίας και επαγγελματικής κατεύθυνσης. Έχουμε μάθει πολλά για programmers αλλά τι γίνεται απο δασκάλους, γιατρούς ή ελευθερους επαγγελματίες? Τι παίζει αν δεν είσαι στην πληροφορική?
7) Τρόπους να κάνεις οικονομία. Το Λονδίνο είναι ακριβό και αν υπάρχουν tips για πιο φτηνά ψώνια (έστω και super - market) που δεν έχουμε υπόψη, θέλουμε να ξέρουμε
8) Λιγότερες ντροπές. Τόσοι και τόσοι blogger υπάρχουν που δεν έχουν κανένα πρόβλημα να δείξουν τη φάτσα τους στο γυαλί. Καλά τα podcast αλλά να έχουμε και ένα πρόσωπο σε σύνδεση με τη φωνή για σημέιο αναφοράς. Μπορεί να είμαστε γείτονες και να συναντίομαστε κάθε μέρα και να μην το ξέρουμε
Εγώ πριν απο λίγο καιρό
Επίσης δείτε και αυτό (κλικ στη εικόνα για να διαβάζετε καλύτερα)
Sunday, November 05, 2017
Πήγα σε αρχαιολόγο... Του έδωσα ένα ταμπόν και τον ρώτησα απο ποιά περίοδο είναι....... Έφυγα τρέχοντας— Mesos Filosofos (@tade_efh) May 16, 2013
Πήγα σε αρχαιολόγο. Του έδωσα ένα ταμπόν και τον ρώτησα από ποια περίοδο είναι. Έφυγα τρέχοντας!— ΥπερΦωτισμένος ♠♥♣♦ (@yperfwtismenos) May 16, 2013
Πήγα σε αρχαιολόγο...— Roadhouse.gr (@roadhousegr) May 17, 2013
Του έδωσα ένα ταμπόν
και τον ρώτησα απο ποιά περίοδο είναι.......
Οταν βαριεμαι παίρνω ενα ταμπον και το πηγαίνω σε έναν αρχαιολόγο για να μου πει απο ποια περίοδο ειναι— Στρουμφ-Γκρινιαρης (@basdion) May 17, 2013
Πήγα σε αρχαιολόγο... Του έδωσα ένα ταμπόν και τον ρώτησα απο ποιά περίοδο είναι Ακομη με κυνηγαει— Panagiotis macmega (@macmega) May 17, 2013
Πήγα σε αρχαιολόγο... Του έδωσα ένα ταμπόν και τον ρώτησα απο ποιά περίοδο είναι....... Έφυγα τρέχοντας— 》Εουζίνιος《♉ (@takmaseugenis) May 17, 2013
Πήγα σε αρχαιολόγο..— D. (@_dwra_) May 17, 2013
Του έδωσα ένα ταμπόν και τον ρώτησα απο ποιά περίοδο είναι..
Πηγα σε αρχαιολογο...του δωσα ενα ταμπον— Panagiotis B.(o σεφ) (@Chef_Panagiotis) May 17, 2013
και τον ρωτησα απο ποια περιοδο ειναι.......
Πήγα τις προάλλες σε έναν αρχαιολόγο, του έδωσα ένα ταμπόν και του ζήτησα να μου πει από ποιά περίοδο είναι. Ακόμα περιμένω....— ιπτάμενος&τζέντλεμαν (@unnamed1914) May 17, 2013
Πως κανεις ρομπα εναν αρχαιολογο?— tasos xalali sou (@xalali_sou) May 17, 2013
Του δινεις ενα ταμπον κ τoν ρωτας απο ποια περιοδο ειναι..
Πήγα σε αρχαιολόγο...— Μαριλού ♔ (@marilenaki_lm) May 17, 2013
Του έδωσα ένα ταμπόν και τον ρώτησα απο ποια περίοδο είναι.......
just read on FB: "Πήγα σε αρχαιολόγο... Του έδωσα ένα ταμπόν και τον ρώτησα απο ποιά περίοδο είναι....... Έφυγα τρέχοντας" έλεος, χαχαχαχαχα— Manos Moulakakis (@ManosMoulakakis) May 17, 2013
Πας σε αρχαιολόγο..του δίνεις ένα ταμπόν και τον ρωτάς από πια περίοδο είναι..?!τρέχεις..— Xenofon Theodoridis (@XenofonTheo) May 18, 2013
Πηγα σε αρχαιολογο. Του εδωσα ενα ταμπον. Τον ρωτησα απο ποια περιοδο ειναι. Εφυγα τρεχοντας.— Maria (@Margia_Gn) May 18, 2013
Πήγα σε αρχαιολόγο...— Iraklis Rigas (@IraklisRigas) May 19, 2013
Του έδωσα ένα ταμπόν και τον ρώτησα από ποια περίοδο είναι.......
Πήγα σε αρχαιολόγο...— Nikos Miltiadis (@NikosMiltiadis) May 19, 2013
Του έδωσα ένα ταμπόν και τον ρώτησα από ποια περίοδο είναι...
Του έδωσα ένα ταμπόν
και τον ρώτησα απο ποιά περίοδο είναι.......
Θα πάρω ένα ταμπόν θα το πάω σε ένα αρχαιολόγο και θα τον ρωτήσω από ποια περίοδο είναι...— Ma-Ria (@MariaVogue2) September 6, 2013
-Πώς βουλώνεις έναν αρχαιολόγο;— Panos Thomas Ntakos (@anima_pura) September 8, 2013
-Του δίνεις ένα ταμπόν και τον ρωτάς από ποιά περίοδο είναι.
Πως σκαλωνεις εναν αρχαιολογο; Του δινεις ενα ταμπον και τον ρωτας απο ποια περιοδο ειναι.— ΦΙΔολος (@Kostas_dinos) September 18, 2013
Πως σκαλωνεις έναν αρχαιολόγο;;— βασιλεια Ζαπ' (@vacileia_malik) September 19, 2013
Του δίνεις ένα ταμπόν και τον ρωτάς από ποιά περίοδο είναι!
Πως σκαλωνεις εναν αρχαιολογο;— Alex Siam (@alex_siameths) September 19, 2013
Του δινεις ενα ταμπον και τον ρωτας απο ποια περιοδο ειναι.
Πως σκαλωνεις εναν αρχαιολογο;— Norab (@_Norab_) September 19, 2013
Του δινεις ενα ταμπον και τον ρωτας απο ποια περιοδο ειναι.
Δίνω ένα ταμπόν σε έναν αρχαιολόγο και τον ρωτάω από ποια περίοδο είναι. Δε γέλασε.— Ρέγκιουλαρ Ζορζ (@giwrgosdem) September 19, 2013
Πως σκαλωνεις εναν αρχαιολογο: του δινεις ενα ταμπον και τον ρωτας απο ποια περιοδο ειναι.— Ιωάννα ♥ (@IwannaVratidou) September 19, 2013
Πως σκαλωνεις εναν αρχαιολογο; Του δινεις ενα ταμπον και τον ρωτας απο ποια περιοδο ειναι— andreas xris (@andreasxris) September 19, 2013
Πως σκαλωνεις εναν αρχαιολογο; Του δινεις ενα ταμπον και τον ρωτας απο ποια περιοδο ειναι.— κωνσταντίνε Μιχ Μιχ (@kwnstantinosper) September 19, 2013
Πώς σκαλώνεις έναν αρχαιολόγο; Του δίνεις ένα ταμπόν και τον ρωτάς από ποια περίοδο είναι.— Ψυχεδέλληα (@recklessdiana) September 20, 2013
Πώς κάνεις ρόμπα έναν αρχαιολόγο; Του δίνεις ένα ταμπόν και τον ρωτάς από ποια περίοδο είναι..!— manosshow (@manosshow) September 21, 2013
Πως σκαλώνεις έναν αρχαιολόγο;;;;;— Kostas Mavroidis (@ko_mavro) September 22, 2013
Του δείχνεις ένα ταμπόν και τον ρωτάς από ποια περίοδο είναι...
Πως σκαλωνεις εναν αρχαιολογο; Του δινεις ενα ταμπον και τον ρωτας απο ποια περιοδο ειναι.— Yiota Politopoulou (@YiotaPolitopou1) September 29, 2013
Βρίσκεις ένα αρχαιολόγο.— Push the button Don (@lelejas) February 25, 2016
Τους δίνεις ένα ταμπον.
Τον ρωτάς από ποια περίοδο είναι.
Έδωσα σε αρχαιολόγο παλιο ταμπον και την ρώτησα απο ποία περίοδο είναι.— Αγγελοκρουσμένη (@aggelokrousmeni) February 25, 2016
Πώς φέρνουμε σε αμηχανία ένα αρχαιολόγο;— Vienna 2017 (@Tsaky_Tsak) July 7, 2016
Του δείχνουμε ένα χρησιμοποιημένο ταμπόν και του ζητάμε να μας πεί από ποιά περίοδο είναι!
Όταν βαριέμαι, παίρνω ένα ταμπον, το δίνω σε έναν αρχαιολογο και τον ρωτάω από ποια περίοδο είναι— διπολική λιακάδα \m/ (@Sleepy_Genius_) December 1, 2016
Thursday, November 02, 2017
Wednesday, November 01, 2017
Tuesday, October 31, 2017
Monday, October 30, 2017
Wednesday, October 25, 2017
In the gap between the Classical period of Greek literature in the fifth century BC and the flowering of Latin literature some four hundred years later, the undisputed centreof ancient learning was the Hellenistic city of Alexandria, in modern Egypt.
The city was founded by Alexander the Great to mark his conquest of Egypt in 331 Bc and was the capital of the ptolemaic pharaohs after Alexander's death. A rich and peaceful city, it attracted the leading scholars of the age, who came to study in its famous library. Although Alexandrian literature never matched the classical greek literature from which it derived, it did have a huge influence on later Roman work.
Most influencial of all was the poet Callimachus, who advocated a move away from the rambling epic style that had gone before and concetrated insead on writing highly polished short verses, few of which now survive. This 'Alexandrian' elegance became proverbial, making a big impression on Roman poets like Catullus, although it has always been associated with dry, scholarly erudition unlike the fresh, vigorous literature that came before
Tuesday, October 24, 2017
We made a mistake. That is the simple, undeniable truth of the matter, however painful it might be. The flaw was not in our Observatories, for those machines were as perfect as we could make, and they showed us only the unfiltered light of truth, The flaw was not in the Predictor, for it is a device of pure, infalliable logic, turning raw data into meaningful information without the taint of emotion or bias. No, the flaw was within us, the Orchestrators of this disaster, the sentients who thought themselves beyond such failings. We are responsible.
It began a short while ago, as these things are measured, less than 6^6 Deeli ago, though I suspect our systems of measure will mean very little by the time anyone receives this transmission. We detected faint radio signals from a blossoming intelligence 2^14 Deelis outward from the Galactic Core, as photons travel. At first, crude and unstructured, these leaking broadcasts quickly grew in complexity and strength, as did the messages they carried. Through our Observatories we watched a race of strife and violence, populated by a barbaric race of short-lived, fast-breeding vermin. They were brutal and uncultured things which stabbed and shot and burned each other with no regard for life or purpose. Even their concepts of Art spoke of conflict and pain. They divided themselves according to some bizarre cultural patterns and set their every industry to cause of death.
They terrified us, but we were older and wiser and so very far away, so we did no fret. Then we watched them split the atom and breech the heavens within the breadth of one of their single, short generations, and we began to worry. When they began actively transmitting messages and greetings into space, we felt fear and horror. Their transmissions promised peace and camaraderie to any who were listening, but we had watched them for too long to buy into such transparent deceptions. They knew we were out here, and they were coming for us.
The Orchestrators consulted the Predictor, and the output was dire. They would multiply and grow and flood out of their home system like some uncountable tide of Devourer worms, consuming all that lay in their path. It might be 6^8 Deelis, but they would destroy us if left unchecked. With aching carapaces, we decided to act, and sealed our fate.
The Gift of Mercy was 8^4 strides long with a mouth 2/4 that in diameter, filled with many 4^4 weights of machinery, fuel, and ballast. It would push itself up to 2/8th of light speed with its onboard fuel, and then begin to consume interstellar Primary Element 2/2 to feed its unlimited acceleration. It would be traveling at nearly light speed when it hit. They would never see it coming. Its launch was a day of mourning, celebration, and reflection. The horror of the act we had committed weighed heavily upon us all; the necessity of our crime did little to comfort us.
The Gift had barely cleared the outer cometary halo when the mistake was realized, but it was too late. The Gift could not be caught, could not be recalled or diverted from its path. The architects and work crews, horrified at the awful power of the thing upon which they labored, had quietly self-terminated in droves, walking unshielded into radiation zones, neglecting proper null pressure, safety or simply ceasing their nutrient consumption until their metabolic functions stopped. The appalling cost in lives had forced the Orchestrators to streamline the Gift's design and construction. There had been no time for the design or implementation of anything beyond the simple, massive engines and the stabilizing systems. We could only watch in shame and horror as the light of genocide faded in infrared against the distant void.
They grew, and they changed, in a handful of lifetimes. They abolished war, abandoned their violent tendencies and turned themselves to the grand purpose of life and Art. We watched them remake first themselves, and then their world. Their frail, soft bodies gave way to gleaming metals and plastics, they unified their people through an omnipotent communications grid and produced Art of such power and emotion, the likes of which the Galaxy has never seen before. Or again, because of us.
They converted their home world into a paradise (by their standards) and many 10^6s of them poured out into the surrounding system with a rapidity and vigor that we could only envy. With bodies built to survive every environment from the day-lit surface of their innermost world, to the atmosphere of their largest gas giant and the cold void in between, they set out to sculpt their system into something beautiful. At first we thought them to be simple miners, stripping the rocky planets and moons for vital resources, but then we began to see the purpose to their construction, the artworks carved into every surface, and traced across the system in glittering lights and dancing fusion trails. And still, our terrible Gift approached.
They had less than 2^2 Deelis to see it, following so closely on the tail of its own light. In that time, oh so brief even by their fleeting lives, more than 10^10 sentients prepared for death. Lovers exchanged last words, separated by worlds and the tyranny of light speed. Their planet-side engineers worked frantically to build sufficient transmission to upload countless masses with the necessary neural modification, while those above dumped lifetimes of music and literature from their databanks to make room for passengers, Those lacking the required hardware of the time to acquire it consigned themselves to death, lashed out in fear and pain, or simply went about their lives as best they could under the circumstances.
The Gift arrived suddenly, the light of its impact visible in our skies, shining bright and cruel even to the unaugmented ocular receptor. We watched and we wept for our victims, dead so many Deelis before the light of their doom had even reached us. Many 6^4s of those who had been directly or even tangentially involved in the creation of the Gift sealed their spiracles as a final penance for the small roles they had played in this atrocity. The light dimmed, the dust cleared, and our Observatories refocused upon the place where their shining blue world had once hung in the void, and found only dust and the pale gleam of an orphaned moon, wrapped in a thin, burning wisp of atmosphere that had once belonged to its parent.
Radiation and relativistic shrapnel had wiped out much of the inner system, and continent-sized chunks of molten rock carried screaming ghosts outward at interstellar escape velocities, damned to wander the great void for an eternity. The damage was apocalyptic, but not complete. From the shadows of the outer worlds, tiny points of light emerged, thousands of fusion trails of single ships and world ships and everything in between, many 10^6s of survivors in flesh and steel and memory banks, ready to rebuild. For a few moments we felt relief, even joy, and we were filled with the hope that their culture and Art would survive the terrible blow we had dealt them. Then came the message, tightly focused at our star, transmitted simultaneously by hundreds of their ships.
"We know you are out there, and we are coming for you."
Creepy Pasta Wiki
Monday, October 23, 2017
Thursday, October 19, 2017
The Aeolian Harp, invented in Germany in the seventeenth century, is an instrument in which strings are made to vibrate by the movement of the air, without any human interference. It is named after Aeolus, an abiguous figure from Greek mythology who was thought to be the master of the four winds.
He appears most famously in a story of the hero Odysseus, who is said to have arrived at a mysterious floating island where Aeolus reigned along with his six sons and daughters (who were, disturbingly, all married to each other).
Strange domestic arrangements notwithstanding, Aeolus entertained the hero kindly, and gave him a gift to help him on his way home: a magical bag in which all the winds were trapped, fastened ith silver string. By only letting out the favourable West ind, Odysseus was able to make swift progress, and before long, the shores of his beloved homeland were in sight.
But some of Odysseus. men greedy for loot, decide to see what their captain was keeping in his mysterious bag and, whle he slept, they untied the silver string. Immediately, the winds that were trapped insid rushed out in allmighty squall, which blew Odysseus all the way back to Aeolus' island.
Wednesday, October 18, 2017
Sunday, October 15, 2017
In Greek myhology, the aegis was a very mysterious garment associated with Zeus and his daughter Athena. Sometimes the aegis is represented as a sort of cloak. At other times, it is a shield or a fringed breastplate. Some accounts have it made out of goatskin (perhaps the skin of the magical she-goat Amalthea) while others claim it was made of gold. In Athena's hands, the aegis is sometimes a mantle woven out of hissing snakes.
At any rate, the aegis was believed to be a tool of incredible power. Zeus could bring down thunderstorms and strike terror into mortals just by shaking it, and Athena wore it in battle in order to terrify her enemies. Set on the front of the aegis was the severed head of the Gorgon Medusa, which was so horrible to look at that anyone who saw it turned to stone.
To be covered by the aegis of the gods was to have some friends in seriously high places, and that sense of protection, coupled with high authority, survives today.
Saturday, October 14, 2017
Achilles' wrath, to Greece the direful spring
Of woes unnumber'd, heavenly goddess sing
Homer, Iliad, i 1-2, trans Alexander Pope
Deprived of their best fighter, the Greek army is pushed back by the Trojans until Achilles' beloved friend Patroclus enters the battle wearing th hero's famous armour. The Trojans, thinking that Achilles has returned, begin to flee, but the Trojan Hero Hector kills Patroclus and stems the tide. Devasted by his friend's death, Achilles vows revenge and defeats the unfortunate Hector under the walls of Troy.
At this point, the Iliad ends, but Achilles become such a huge figure in the Greek world that later writers (like modern fans who write home - made sequels to The Lord of The Rings) kept adding to the mythology around him. It was the Roman poet Statius who introduced the story that the baby Achilles had been dipped in the River Styx. This, Statius wrote, made him involnerable except at the heel by which his mother had held him.
In Statius' version, Achilles is finally killed by a poisoned arrow that strikes the vulnerable spot, and ever since, any fatal weakness has been called an 'Achilles heel'.
Friday, October 13, 2017
Thursday, October 12, 2017
Wednesday, October 11, 2017
Through the Academy, Plato taught young Athenian aristocrats (including the equally influential philosopher Aristotle) the arts of philosophy, geometry and mathematics. Even after Plato's death the academy continued as a centre of learning, developing ideas which would become the foundation of Western philosophy and which would have a profound influence on the development of Christian ideology hundreds of years later.
In modern English, the world 'academic' has come to imply 'out of touch', 'pointless' or 'obscure'. This of course is terribly unfair on the original Academics, whose philosophies lie at the very heart of later Western thought.
Friday, October 06, 2017
Thursday, October 05, 2017
Wednesday, October 04, 2017
I’m a monster.
I don’t mean that in the sense that I’m a terrible person or anything like that; I mean it in the sense that I’m a monstrous Hell-creature that feeds off human fear and misery. You may be wondering why I’m writing this to you; it’s because I need your help. I’ll get to the specifics in a moment, but first I’d like to explain why I need your help at all.
About sixteen hundred years ago, some practitioners of black magic discovered an ancient Latin text and summoned me to this plane of existence to do their bidding. Only, one of the warlocks, Adriel I think his name was, messed the ritual up so that I was no longer bound to do their will. Apparently they wanted me to enact an apocalypse that would destroy the current world order and set them up as leaders. I decided that was a bit much so I just slaughtered them all instead.
I might have enacted the apocalypse anyway, but Adriel’s screw-up caused me to be summoned with only a tiny fraction of my power.
Even so, I left Adriel alive, mostly because he seemed like a good lad. He went on to become a baker later on if I recall correctly.
I burned the summoning scroll and went back to my plane of existence, where I had been tormenting lost souls with my kids. However, it seems like I should have killed Adriel after all, because unbeknownst to me, he had transcribed the summoning ritual and bequeathed it to his children after he died. The scroll was lost for centuries, until one of Adriel’s modern descendants discovered it in his great-grandfather’s attic while preparing for an after-death estate sale.
He decided to get it translated out of curiosity, and afterwards he decided that the contents would make a great “creepypasta.” He even included the original Latin incantation for flavor. This was a few years ago when the fad of ritualistic stories was still booming. To my great surprise and distress, my summoning instructions became somewhat popular. At this point, I hadn’t been to Earth in over a thousand years, and I had been summoned by the most powerful of dark wizards.
Now, every few days I was being whisked out of Hell by some drunk teenagers shining flashlights up at their face in their bathroom trying to scare each other.
You see, a long time ago, when literacy was exceptionally rare, my summoning ritual was extremely complicated. But in the days of booming literacy rates and Google translate, it’s become absurdly easy.
Luckily for me, though, Adriel didn’t just fuck up when he summoned me, he fucked up when he transcribed the ritual as well, so that I’m not bound to anyone’s will when I get summoned. That’s a good thing, because drunk human teenagers usually ask me to do some pretty weird stuff. However, I still only get summoned with a tiny fraction of my full power, so I usually just terrify them to their very core before whisking back to Hell so that they won’t bother me again.
That was until Lucy.
Last month some six year old girl found my “creepypasta” summoning ritual, and decided to try it out. By chance, she got the ending right. I suppose it was bound to happen eventually; it was only a small mistake that Adriel made in the transcription after all.
The problem is that she’s not actually evil in any sense of the word. She’s managed to summon a demon capable of bringing about the Apocalypse, and she has me do things like materialize cotton candy and puppies out of thin air.
Her parents are always flabbergasted when they arrive to pick her up from school and she’s surrounded by at least eight puppies.
At this point, I don’t even care about destroying humans and feasting on their souls anymore, I’d really just like to go back home. So I’m asking for your help. I need someone here to complete my banishing ritual so I can go back to Hell and live in peace.
It’s actually quite simple, you just draw a pentagram in a mirror, light seven candles and read the following words:
Daemonum Magister ab antiquo,
dono tibi mea corpus, gratia liberabo vos
ego vivere invite vos intra corpus mea
ego immolo anima mea
nos vanae humanae creaturae,
nos apetimus mortis et infernus
producat in fine hominis
So if anyone could help me out it would be greatly appreciated.
Tuesday, October 03, 2017
Dafydd ap Gruffydd was also the first nobleman to be executed by being hanged, drawn and quartered. On 30 September, Dafydd ap Gruffudd, Prince of Wales, was condemned to death, the first person known to have been tried and executed for what from that time onwards would be described as high treason against the King.
Monday, October 02, 2017
Saturday, September 30, 2017
Thursday, September 28, 2017
Wednesday, September 27, 2017
Tuesday, September 26, 2017
Monday, September 25, 2017
Sunday, September 24, 2017
Saturday, September 23, 2017
Friday, September 22, 2017
Thursday, September 21, 2017
Wednesday, September 20, 2017
Tuesday, September 19, 2017
- 'I might join you later' - Translation: I'm not leaving the house today unless it's on fire
- 'Excuse me, sorry, is anyone sitting here?' - Translation: You have three seconds to move your bag before I end you.
- 'Not to worry' - Translation: I will never forget this
- Saying sorry as a way of introducing yourself.
- 'Bit wet out there' - Translation: You're going to need a snorkel because it's absolutely pissing down
- Ending emails with 'Thanks' as a warning that you are perilously close to losing your temper
- 'Right then, I suppose I really should start thinking about possibly making a move' - Translation 'Bye'
- 'It's fine' - Translation It really could not possibly get any worse, but no doubt it will do
- 'Perfect' - Translation: Well that's ruined
- 'A bit of a pickle' - Translation: A catastrophically bad situation with potentially fatal consequesnces
- 'Not too bad, actually' - Translation: I'm probably the happiest I've ever been
- 'Honestly, it doesn't matter' - Translation: Nothing has ever mattered more than this
- 'You've caught the sun' - Translation: You look like you've been swimming in a volcano
- 'That's certainly one way of looking at it' - Translation: That's certainly the wrong way of looking at it.
- Saying 'I have the 5p if it helps?' and never being quite sure it helps
- 'If you say so' - Translation: I'm afraid that what you're saying is the height of idiocy'
- 'With all due respect' - Translation: You have absolutely no idea what you're talking about
- Saying 'you're welcome' as quietly as possible to people that don't say thank you but using it as a form of punishing them
- Meanings of 'I beg your pardon; (1) I didn't hear (2) I apologise (3) What you're saying is making me absolutely livid
- 'It could be worse' - Tanslation: It couldn't possibly be any worse
- 'Each to their own' - Translation: You're wrong, but never mind
- 'Pop round anytime' - translation: Please stay away from my house
- 'I'm just popping out for lunch, does anyone want anything?' - Translation: I'm getting my own lunch now, please remain silent
- Saying 'I might get some cash out actually', despite approaching the cash machine and being 100% certain of getting cash
- 'No, no, honestly, my fault' - Translation: It was exceedingly your fault and we both know it
- 'No yeah that's very interesting' - Translation: you are boring me to death
- 'Just whenever you get a minute' - Translation: NOW
- 'No harm done' - Translation: You have caused complete and utter chaos
- 'I'm sure it will be fine' - Translation: I fully expect the situation to deteriorate rapidly
- 'Sorry, I think you might have dropped something' - Translation: You have definitely dropped that specific item
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Monday, September 18, 2017
Sunday, September 17, 2017
Thursday, September 14, 2017
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Saturday, September 09, 2017
Thursday, September 07, 2017
Wednesday, September 06, 2017
Tuesday, September 05, 2017
Monday, September 04, 2017
Thursday, August 31, 2017
When Jamie goes north, the people who know that he pushed Bran out of the tower will not say anything. Bran is now the three eyed raven and is clearly beyond such concerns.
Jamie might have lost his hand but he is not as worthless as he seems. He is still a valuable fighter and Tyrion will welcome him with open arms. His help will be welcomed and it will flatter Danny. After all, he is one of Cersei's closest supporters, if he deserts her then that sends a message to her troops and the rest of Westeros.
Cersei will probably die in childbirth. Her kid will survive and will be raised by the northern family. This will be for personal reasons - Tyrion loved Tommen and Myrcela inspite of their mother, he could probably care for the new kid too - and for political reasons - the kid is the rightful heir to the throne for the Baratheon/Lannister supporters. Being raised by Danny as her heir will consolidate the kingdoms without war.
It will be kind of like queen Elizabeth of England and Mary queen of Scots. They hated each other but Mary's son was Elizabeth's heir and in the end, the kingdoms were united without bloodshed (sort of).
Wednesday, August 30, 2017
Over two millennia after it first came to prominence, stoicism is having a moment. It’s on the internet, of course: the stoicism subreddit, the largest meeting place for stoics online, has over 28,000 subscribers, many times the number of erstwhile rival Epicureanism (around 4,000). But it is also infiltrating real life, even in its toughest forms. The Navy Seals teach stoic insights to new recruits; throughout the NFL, players and coaches are devouring Ryan Holiday’s guide to stoicism, “The Obstacle Is the Way”. Tim Ferriss, a start-up guru, extols the benefits of Stoicism at firms such as Google. “For entrepreneurs,” says Ferriss, “it’s a godsend.”
Even in antiquity, stoicism was noted for its practicality. Ancient Greek and Roman stoics wrote about theology, logic and metaphysics, but their focus was on the “hic et nunc”, the here and now. “Stoicism tells you what in life is worth having and gives you a way to get there,” says William Irvine, the author of the stoic handbook, “A Guide to the Good Life”. The key is learning to be satisfied with what you’ve got. “Some things are up to us and others are not,” taught Epictetus. “Up to us are opinion, impulse, desire…Not up to us are body, property, reputation, office, in a word, whatever is not our own action.” This indifference to everyday comforts has left stoicism with a reputation for coldness. In reality, its defenders argue, it is simply a rational approach to managing expectations. The central insight of stoicism is that life is tough and changeable, so prepare for difficulty.
Many modern stoics argue that this doctrine has already been partially revived in the form of cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), the “problem-focused” therapy now widely seen as psychology’s best weapon against depression, anxiety and every kind of unhelpful thinking. Like stoicism, CBT encourages practitioners to distinguish between events and perceptions, and nearly every CBT textbook contains some version of Epictetus’s dictum: “Men are disturbed not by things, but the views they take of them.” Yet although the founders of CBT openly acknowledged the influence of stoicism, they tended to adopt the techniques without reference to the wider moral framework. “Stoicism transcends most modern self-help and therapy by offering the view that much of our emotional suffering is caused by false values, such as egotism, materialism or hedonism,” says Donald Robertson, a cognitive-behavioural psychotherapist who is one of the organisers of Stoic Week.
Stoicism is first and foremost a set of beliefs that practitioners can use in a number of ways. “My daily routine consists of a morning meditation during which I contemplate the likely challenges of the day,” explains Massimo Pigliucci. “Then there is an evening meditation, which is the reverse of the morning one.” The Italian-born philosopher came to stoicism when he was going through “something you might call a mid-life crisis”. Since October 2014, he has been practising daily stoic rituals, chronicling his experiences on a blog. “I also practise stoic mindfulness throughout the day,” he tells me, “which basically means to pay attention to the ethical dimension of everything you do.”
The shortage of sources – the major works survive more or less intact, but hundreds of books by lesser-known stoics exist only as fragments – means any attempt to reconstruct stoicism involves a good deal of imaginative interpretation. Even so, it seems a stretch to associate stoic moral self-criticism with the neutral focus of mindfulness. Asking, as Seneca instructs, “What evil of yours have you cured today?” may eventually produce tranquillity, but only after a demanding process of self-examination. The term stoic mindfulness reflects the ambition to philosophise therapy, whereas other writers (most notably Holiday) focus on stoicism primarily as a path to success. Meanwhile, other elements of ancient stoicism – especially the belief in divine providence – vanish entirely from modern accounts. “Stoics held some claims that would be very hard to popularise now,” says Alexander Long, a senior lecturer in Classics at the University of St Andrews. “So the most promising way forward is to offer a selective view of stoicism, one that focuses not on specific doctrines but on the broad framework in which stoics explore ethics and psychology.”
Not everyone is enthusiastic about the prospect of a stoic revival. “Some of the biggest determinants of our wellbeing are socio-economic and political, and I think as stoics we may sometimes forget that,” says the health psychologist Vincent Deary. He tells the story of two cancer specialists who complained to their hospital about working conditions, only to find themselves offered resilience training to cope with the situation. “It’s this idea that we’re not going to change circumstances, so you’re just going to have to get better at dealing with it,” he says. “Are we telling people who we should be helping to get water that they should be resisting their thirst?”
For Helen Rudd, such debates feel like a luxury. “On a personal level, there are some things you can’t change,” she says. These days, she is even able to see the benefits of her accident: she may walk falteringly but, as a result, she looks around. It’s this determination to keep going that binds together stoics ancient and modern. In the words of Seneca: “As long as you live, keep learning how to live.”
Tuesday, August 29, 2017
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Sunday, August 20, 2017
Saturday, August 19, 2017
Tallulah, in the Mississippi Delta, is picturesque but not prosperous. Many of the jobs it used to have are gone. Two prisons and a county jail provide work for a few guards but the men behind bars, obviously, do not have jobs. Nor do many of the young men who hang around on street corners, shooting dice and shooting the breeze. In Madison Parish, the local county, only 47% of men of prime working age (25-54) are working.
The men in Tallulah are typically not well educated: the local high school’s results are poor even by Louisiana’s standards. That would have mattered less, in the old days. A man without much book-learning could find steady work at the mill or in the fields. But the lumber mill has closed, and on nearby farms “jobs that used to take 100 men now take ten,” observes Jason McGuffie, a pastor. A strong pair of hands is no longer enough.
“If you don’t have an education, what can you do?” asks Paxton Branch, the mayor. “You can’t even answer a phone if you don’t have proper English.” Blue-collar jobs require more skills than they used to, notes Katie McCarty of the North East Louisiana Workforce Centres, a job-placement agency. If you want to be a truck driver, you need at least an eighth-grade education to handle the paperwork, she observes; that is, the mental skills a 13- or 14-year-old is supposed to have, and which men disproportionately lack.
Orlando Redden is in his mid-40s and sporadically employed. He is big, strong and, by all accounts, a hard worker. But he is inarticulate, hazy about numbers and has no skills that would make an employer sit up and take notice. He has bounced from job to job throughout his adult life: minding the slot machines in a casino, driving a forklift, working as a groundskeeper, and so on.
The forklift job, at a factory that made mufflers for cars, was the best: it paid $10.95 an hour. But then the factory closed. He lost his groundskeeper job, too, when a new boss merged two roles (groundskeeper and maintenance man) into one, and gave it to the man with more skills. He recently found a job with a paving contractor, which is better than nothing but requires him to commute more than 30 miles (50km) a day.
Tallulah may be an extreme example, but it is part of a story playing out across America and much of the rest of the rich world. In almost all societies a lot of men enjoy unwarranted advantages simply because of their sex. Much has been done over the past 50 years to put this injustice right; quite a bit still remains to be done.
The dead hand of male domination is a problem for women, for society as a whole—and for men like those of Tallulah. Their ideas of the world and their place in it are shaped by old assumptions about the special role and status due to men in the workplace and in the family, but they live in circumstances where those assumptions no longer apply. And they lack the resources of training, of imagination and of opportunity to adapt to the new demands. As a result, they miss out on a lot, both in economic terms and in personal ones.
For those at the top, James Brown’s observation that it is a man’s, man’s, man’s world still holds true. Some 95% of Fortune 500 CEOs are male, as are 98% of the self-made billionaires on the Forbes rich list and 93% of the world’s heads of government. In popular films fewer than a third of the characters who speak are women, and more than three-quarters of the protagonists are men. Yet the fact that the highest rungs have male feet all over them is scant comfort for the men at the bottom.
Technology and trade mean that rich countries have less use than they once did for workers who mainly offer muscle. A mechanical digger can replace dozens of men with spades; a Chinese steelworker is cheaper than an American. Men still dominate risky occupations such as roofer and taxi-driver, and jobs that require long stints away from home, such as trucker and oil-rig worker. And, other things being equal, dirty, dangerous and inconvenient jobs pay better than safe, clean ones. But the real money is in brain work, and here many men are lagging behind. Women outnumber them on university campuses in every region bar South Asia and sub-Saharan Africa. In the OECD men earn only 42% of degrees. Teenage boys in rich countries are 50% more likely than girls to flunk all three basic subjects in school: maths, reading and science.
The economic marginalisation this brings erodes family life. Women who enjoy much greater economic autonomy than their grandmothers did can afford to be correspondingly pickier about spouses, and they are not thrilled by husbands who are just another mouth to feed.
If the sort of labour that a man like Mr Redden might willingly perform with diligence and pride is no longer in great demand, that does not mean there are no jobs at all. Everywhere you look in Tallulah there are women working: in the motels that cater to passing truckers, in the restaurants that serve all-you-can-eat catfish buffets, in shops, clinics and local government offices. But though unskilled men might do some of those jobs, they are unlikely to want them or to be picked for them.
In “The End of Men”, a good book with a somewhat excessive title, Hanna Rosin notes that of the 30 occupations expected to grow fastest in America in the coming years, women dominate 20, including nursing, accounting, child care and food preparation. “The list of working-class jobs predicted to grow is heavy on nurturing professions, in which women, ironically, seem to benefit from old stereotypes,” writes Ms Rosin. And those old stereotypes are deeply ingrained in the minds of the men they marginalise; they no more see jobs centred on serving or caring as their sort of thing than society does.
Although there is no reason in theory why men could not become nurses or care-home assistants, few do. Most schools would love to have more male teachers to serve as role models for boys, but not many volunteer. And poorly educated men are often much worse at things such as showing up on time and being pleasant to customers (even if you don’t feel like it) than their female peers are. For the working class, the economy “has become more amenable to women than to men”, argues Ms Rosin.
Criminality, alas, remains an option for men of all skill sets, as Tallulah’s prisons bear witness. The world’s most dysfunctional people are nearly all male. Men have always been more violent than women, even if they are less violent now than they used to be. In America today they commit 90% of murders and make up 93% of the prison population. They are also four times more likely to kill themselves than women are.
For many men in Tallulah, the greatest obstacle to finding a job is that they have already fallen foul of the law. Mikel Davis, a polite 29-year-old, is typical. He graduated from high school a decade ago and got “caught up in the street,” he says. “My mind wasn’t there. I wasn’t dedicated to the right.”
He started to deal small quantities of marijuana. He was caught, briefly jailed and released on probation. “I haven’t peed dirty since,” he says, but with a criminal record “finding a job was hell.” Mr Davis applied to McDonald’s, Arby’s, Chevron—you name it. After a year he found work “washing cars in the rain”. Now he toils at a burger joint, and is training to be a welder. When Mr Davis was selling drugs, he says, he could make more in a day than he does in a week wiping tables. But crime seldom pays in the long run. It is no way to support a family.
Mr Redden has three children by three women. Mr Davis has two children by two. Neither man lives with any of the mothers or any of their children. Mr Davis supports both of his, he says: one, financially; the other, by visiting and helping around the home. He says he is still friendly with one mother, but “not in a committed relationship”.
When they talk about a man’s role in the home, though, both men sound like preachers from the 1950s. “Being a man means supporting your family,” says Mr Davis. “You’ve got to do whatever it takes so they eat, [or] you’re no man at all.” Being a man, says Mr Redden, means you “work hard, provide for your kids, have a car and [maybe] get your own house some day.” Mr Davis goes further: “If I have kids and my woman has to work, that’s not what a woman should do. She should be home with the kids.”
There is, to put it mildly, a disconnect between these ideas of a man’s role and the reality of life in Tallulah. The busy women of Tallulah are far from rich, but they are getting by, and they are doing so without much help from men.
Fifty years ago the norms for marriage in most rich countries were simple and sexist. If a man got a woman pregnant the couple got married; in 1960 in America 30% of brides gave birth within eight and a half months of the wedding, according to June Carbone of the University of Minnesota and Naomi Cahn of George Washington University. After the arrival of children, the husband’s responsibility was to earn and the wife’s was to mind the home. There were exceptions, but the rules were universally understood and widely followed. According to Ms Carbone and Ms Cahn more than 80% of wives with young children stayed at home in 1960.
Those norms have changed. The pill, which was approved in America that same year, allowed women to regulate their fertility. It used to be common for brainy women to drop out of college when they became pregnant. Now they can time their babies to fit with their careers. The ability to defer children is one of the reasons why 23% of married American women with children now out-earn their husbands, up from 4% in 1960. Few women in rich countries now need a man’s support to raise a family. (They might want it, but they don’t need it.)
With women in a better position to demand equality, many men have changed their behaviour accordingly. Studies of who does what within two-parent families show a big generational shift. In 1965 fathers did 42 hours of paid work, 4 hours of housework and 2.5 hours of child care each week, according to the Pew Research Centre. Mothers did seven times as much housework as fathers, four times as much child care and one-fifth as much paid work, adding up to 51 hours a week. Overall, men had two extra hours a week to drink highballs and complain about their daughters’ boyfriends.
Fast-forward to 2011 and there is less housework—thanks to dishwashers and ready meals—more evenly divided, with the mother doing 18 hours a week to the father’s 10. Both parents are doing more child care. The mother is doing a lot more paid work; the father is doing five hours less. Overall, the father is toiling for 1.5 hours a week longer than the mother.
The same Pew survey suggests that most couples don’t think the compromise they have reached is wildly out of kilter. Fully 68% of women say they spend the “right amount” of time with their kids; only 8% say they spend too much. Many parents find it hard to balance work and family, but there is not much apparent difference between the sexes on this score: 56% of mothers and 50% of fathers say this is “very” or “somewhat” difficult.
As a measure of how male attitudes have changed, however, this sample is misleading. It excludes families where the father is no longer there. Couples split up for a variety of reasons, but a common complaint among women who throw out their partners is that the man was not doing his fair share. And here there is a huge class divide. Isabel Sawhill of the Brookings Institution argues, in “Generation Unbound”, that college-educated men have adapted reasonably well to the feminist revolution but it “seems to have bypassed low-income men”.
In 1970 there was not much difference between the happiness of better-off families and that of the less-well-off: 73% of educated white Americans and 67% of working-class whites said their marriages were “very happy”, observes Charles Murray, a conservative writer. Among the professional class, marital satisfaction dipped sharply in the 1980s, suggesting that for a while men and women struggled with the new rules. But it has since recovered to roughly the level it was in 1970. By contrast, the share of working-class whites who say their marriages are very happy has fallen to barely 50%, despite the fact that fewer of them are getting hitched in the first place. In Britain, too, more-educated couples are more likely to say their relationship is “extremely happy”.
This difference is in part because unskilled men have less to offer than once they did. In America pay for men with only a high school diploma fell 21% in real terms between 1979 and 2013; for those who dropped out of high school it fell by a staggering 34%. Women did better. Female high-school graduates gained 3%; high-school dropouts lost 12%.
And the change is even more dramatic than these figures suggest. First, women are now better educated than men; the proportion of women with no more than a high-school education fell from 32.9% in 1979—one percentage point higher than men—to 11.4% in 2013, one percentage point lower. Second, many men do not work at all. In America, the share of men of prime working age who have a job has fallen from a peak of nearly 95% in the mid-1960s to only 84% in 2010. In Britain the share of men aged 16-64 who work has fallen from 92% in 1971 to 76% in 2013; for women it has risen from 53% to 67%. For those with few qualifications the situation is worse: in America in 2010 25% of 25- to 54-year-old men with only a high-school education were not in work; for those who did not graduate high school the rate was 35%.
There is no sugar-coating this: many blue-collar men no longer have the sort of earnings or prospects that will make women want to marry them. A recent Pew poll found that 78% of never-married American women say it is “very important” that a potential spouse should have a steady job. (Only 46% of never-married men said the same.) In theory, this preference should not stop men without steady jobs from finding a mate. There are roughly equal numbers of heterosexual men and women in rich countries, so you might expect nearly everyone to pair up. For poor people, especially, it makes sense. Two pairs of hands can juggle work and kids more easily. Spouses can support each other through sickness or night school. But this works only if both believe that the commitment is long-term. It is pointless to make plans with someone you fear will sponge off you for a while and then vanish.
Which brings up the other side of the control modern contraception offers. When pregnancy is easily prevented or can be legally ended, it no longer functions as a road to marriage. It makes it easier for men who choose not to stick around to tell themselves, and their partners, that a child was not part of the deal.
No single factor can account for the fragility of working-class families. But economic and technological shifts have clearly affected social norms. Some scholars blame the welfare state for making the male breadwinner redundant. Robert Rector of the Heritage Foundation, a conservative think-tank, protests that women at the bottom of the social scale end up “married” to the taxpayer. Means-tested benefits make it easier to get by without a spouse, and sometimes penalise marriage. In America, a single mother with two children who earns $15,000 a year would typically receive $5,200 in food stamps, which would fall to zero if she were to marry a father who earned the same; and that is just one of 80 or so means-tested federal benefits.
Teena Davison, a cook in Tallulah, is raising four children on her own. One father is in Texas; the other is nearby but disengaged. “Sometimes they help out but basically I do it all,” she says. She gave up trying to make either man do his share. “I don’t want to go through it because they constantly lie, you know, tell the kids I’m going to get you this and never get it.” So, she says, “I don’t even bother with them [or] make a big fuss about it.”
Nonetheless, she worries that the absence of a father might affect her children. The older ones “say bad things” about their dad when he lets them down. Ms Davison tells them to stop, “because he’s their dad no matter what”.
Sex ratios matter when it comes to forging relationships. And here the falling fortunes of working-class men do further damage. In 1960, among never-married American adults aged 25-34, there were 139 men with jobs for every 100 women, with or without jobs. (This was because women typically married somewhat older men.) By 2012 there were only 91 employed men for every 100 women in this group. “When women outnumber men, men become cads,” argue Ms Carbone and Ms Cahn in “Marriage Markets: How Inequality is Remaking the American Family”.
Even a small imbalance can have big effects. Imagine a simplified “mating market” consisting of ten men and ten women, all heterosexual. Everyone pairs up. Now take one man away. One woman is doomed to be single, so she may opt to poach another woman’s partner. A chain reaction ensues: all the women are suddenly less secure in their relationships. Some of the men, by contrast, become tempted to play the field rather than settle down.
In most rich countries the supply of eligible blue-collar men does not match demand. Among black Americans, thanks to mass incarceration, it does not come close. For every 100 African-American women aged 25-54 who are not behind bars, there are only 83 men of the same age at liberty. In some American inner cities there are only 50 black men with jobs for every 100 black women, calculates William Julius Wilson of Harvard University. In theory black women could “marry out”, but few do: in 2010 only 9% of black female newly-weds married men of another race.
When men with jobs are in short supply, as they are in poor neighbourhoods throughout the rich world, any presentable male can get sex, but few women will trust him to stick around or behave decently. Kathryn Edin and Maria Kefalas, two sociologists, asked a sample of inner-city women of all races why they broke up with their most recent partner. Four in ten blamed his chronic, flagrant infidelity; half complained that he was violent.
Such experiences make working-class women distrust men in general. They still have babies with men, but they seldom marry them. A whopping 50% of births to American women without college degrees are non-marital, but only 6% of births to college graduates are. Similar trends can be seen in Europe. In Britain 90% of professional couples wait until they are married before having kids, compared with only half of those who earn the minimum wage. Looking at eight European countries, Brienna Perelli-Harris of the University of Southampton and others found that the less educated a mother is, the more likely she is to have a baby outside marriage.
Caitlin (not her real name), who lives in Hartlepool, in north-east England, first got pregnant at 16, ten years ago. She now has four children by two men. She broke up with the first one (a labourer) because they quarrelled “all the time”. “He’d argue about me going out the door,” she says. He was hardly a model father. Whether he helped with the chores depended on his mood, she says, and losing at PlayStation would put him into a foul one. He now lives with a new girlfriend. Caitlin does not trust him to take proper care of the children, so she has stopped them from seeing him. He tried to con the authorities to pay him the child benefits that should have gone to her, she says. As for the father of her fourth child: “I found out he was going to jail for GBH [inflicting grievous bodily harm] from the Hartlepool Mail.” She has concluded that: “It’s easier without men. It’s more predictable. I know whether I’m coming or going.”
Hartlepool has much in common with Tallulah. It was once a thriving industrial town, but as jobs in factories have vanished, the nuclear family has collapsed. The share of babies born outside marriage in Hartlepool has jumped from 12% in 1974 to 70% in 2013 (in England and Wales it rose from 9% to 48%).
Old-timers say life used to be simple for men. “I finished school at 16 on July 25th 1969. On August 1st I started in the steelworks,” recalls Dave Wise. “You always knew where you were going to work. If your dad was at the steelworks, you went there too.” Mr Wise now runs a community centre in West View, a down-at-heel part of Hartlepool. A sign outside says “Bite Back at Loan Sharks”—a local scourge.
Young men from Hartlepool who make it through university do just fine. But as in the rest of the rich world, boys there do worse than girls in school. They read less, do less homework and are more disruptive—which may be why teachers give the same paper a worse grade if they know it was written by a boy, according to the OECD. Raymond Steel, a 19-year-old from Dyke House, another troubled Hartlepool neighbourhood, says he didn’t enjoy school. “I lost interest quickly and was naughty until I got sent home.” The girls did better, recalls his friend Kieran Murphy, because “they paid more attention.” Both men are now learning trades—plumber and builder—but expect the hunt for work to be arduous.
They could move to London, where jobs are more plentiful. But it is hard to leave a tight-knit neighbourhood. In Hartlepool, siblings and cousins often live a street or two away, which creates a network of support. Caitlin and her sister, who is also a single mother, often help each other with the child care.
As in Tallulah, many men in Hartlepool have old-fashioned views. Mr Steel says it would be “a bad thing” if his future wife earned more than him—“You’d feel you were not providing.” When men and women expect different things, relationships fail. Some hard-up mothers have all but given up hope of finding Mr Right. They strive to become financially independent and insist on controlling their own households, notes Ms Sawhill. “They often act as gatekeepers, by denying a father access to his own children.”
Single motherhood is much better than living with an abusive partner. But the chronic instability of low-income families hurts women, children and men. The poverty rate for single-mother families in America is 31%, nearly three times the national norm. Children who grow up in broken families do worse in school, earn less as adults and find it harder to form stable families of their own. Boys are worse affected than girls, perhaps because they typically grow up without a father as a role model. Thus the problems of marginalised men tumble on down the generations.
Men who never shoulder family responsibilities miss out on a lot of joy, and so do many fatherless boys. In Britain, fewer than half of the children of divorce say they have a good relationship with their father. Mr Redden complains that his son, who lives with his mother, “doesn’t listen to me...we ain’t that tight like I’d like us to be.”
Sweden has done a better job than most countries of fostering equality between the sexes, and its success is particularly apparent in child care. You can’t throw a ball in a Stockholm park without hitting a bearded man pushing a pram. Fredrik Blid, an engineer, is taking two of his small children for a stroll. “Day care is closed,” he explains. Mr Blid and his partner (an art director at a firm that makes things for babies) split the child care 50/50. If a child is sick, they take alternate days off work. They did not discuss this before they had children. “It was natural,” he says.
Perhaps. If so, though, nature has been helped along by the Swedish government’s decades of work aimed at promoting gender equality, effort which consistently sees it get the highest scores on the Economist Intelligence Unit’s Women’s Economic Opportunity Index. The equality seen in parenting is supported and shaped by generous parental-leave laws. Each couple is entitled to 480 days off work (between them) for each child. The government pays the stay-at-home parent up to 946 kroner a day ($112) to replace lost wages. Sixty of those 480 days are reserved for men, and are lost if not used. The government offers a bonus of up to 13,500 kroner per child to couples who take equal time off work.
Such policies have had an effect: the share of parental-leave taken by men quadrupled from 6% in 1985 to 25% in 2013. But the government is not satisfied. It sees the unequal division of child care as one of the biggest remaining obstacles to women earning as much as men. Two of the smaller Swedish parties (including the Feminist party, which is bankrolled by Benny Andersson of ABBA), want to compel men to take 50% of parental leave.
This goes too far for many Swedes, particularly those with manual jobs. Working-class Swedish men often make much more money than their wives, thanks to strong unions in heavily male industries. When a waitress makes only 20,000 kroner a month, having her 50,000-a-month construction-worker husband take time off represents a significant cost, says Karin Svanborg-Sjovall of Timbro, a free-market think-tank in Stockholm; many might see it as an unreasonable one. Among white-collar workers, wages are more equal and there is a less macho culture, so child care is split more evenly.
The parental-leave policy works well for professional women, many of whom work for the government, which is happy to accommodate their long absences (65% of managers in the public sector are female). But it has been a mixed blessing for blue-collar women in the private sector. Employers know that young female job applicants are likely to take a lot of time off. None would admit to discriminating, of course, but it is striking that 25% of blue-collar women are on temporary contracts and 50% work part-time—of whom nearly half say they would like to work full-time but cannot find an opening.
Some liberal Scandinavian men find their new roles demoralising. Karl Ove Knausgaard, a Norwegian novelist married to a Swede, writes of walking “around Stockholm’s streets, modern and feminised, with a furious 19th-century man inside me”. One expects novelists to be disgruntled, but they are not the only ones. In a recent poll 23% of Swedish men supported the far-right Sweden Democrats (SD)—more than twice the number of women who did. A similar pattern can be seen in other European countries: men are far more likely than women to vote for protest parties such as Greece’s Golden Dawn, Hungary’s Jobbik, the Netherlands’ PVV and France’s Front National.
The SD is an anti-immigrant party: its supporters fret that hordes of refugees from Somalia and Syria will bankrupt Sweden’s welfare state. However, it is also in revolt against what William Hahne, an SD leader, calls “extreme feminism”. The SD wants to return to a family-based tax system that would favour single-breadwinner homes. Mr Hahne complains that “If a man is masculine in Sweden today he is seen as bad.” A hunky blond ex-paratrooper, he had to apologise after getting drunk and abusive in a bar in Iceland in 2010.
Some supporters of the Sweden Democrats are men who have been left behind as the economy shifts from industry to services, suggests Asa Regner, Sweden’s minister for gender equality. Others take a “very old-fashioned” view of the family that the majority has left behind, but a minority misses deeply. Many of them, Ms Regner speculates, “wish for a country which is simply not there any more.”
Men are not easy to help. “We find it’s very difficult to connect with [them],” says Carol Walker of Relate, a British counselling charity. “They don’t want to talk about their relationships, sometimes.” This slotting into stereotype matters more when economic times are hard. Couples badly affected by the financial crisis were eight times more likely to split up than those who were unscathed, according to a Relate-sponsored study called “Relationships, Recession and Recovery”. As ever, the connections go both ways: the same study found that an unstable relationship at home makes it harder to thrive in the workplace.
Losing a job can affect a man’s libido. “If they’ve always been strong and suddenly feel helpless, that can cause sexual problems,” says Ms Walker, who works in north-east England. Some men feel emasculated if their partner out-earns them. “It is hard to be a traditional man in a non-traditional world,” says Ms Walker.
If you offer a man counselling, he may refuse. The very notion is unmanly, some feel, though it is often quite effective. Still, there are ways to lure men into talking about their feelings. John Errington, a former lorry driver, organises a “men’s shed” in Wingate, a former mining village near Hartlepool. It is literally a shed, with a darts board and a hob for making tea. Local men meet there and do constructive things, such as plant vegetables or do odd jobs. At the same time, they socialise. Some have lost jobs or wives; others just want something to do. At least one volunteer is trained in spotting the warning signs of depression or suicide.
Hanna Rosin talks of “plastic women”, who adapt deftly to economic and social change, and “cardboard men”, who fail to adapt and are left crumpled. She has a point. The sheds, though, show some are trying. On a recent Wednesday afternoon four men in Wingate gathered to chat and cook panacalty, a local stew of corned beef, potatoes, carrots, leeks and sprouts, swimming in beef stock. “It gets me out of the house,” says Ken Teasdale, a widower. “We all help each other,” says Barry Setterfield, a retired joiner. The “men’s sheds” movement, canny in its appropriation of one of the time-honoured male preserves not normally associated with power or status, started in Australia and has spread to Britain, Finland and Greece. There are more than 40 in County Durham, where Wingate is. Boosters say they save public money by keeping men out of hospital. Participants love them.
As the sheds show, working-class men have changed with the times. At home they are far more likely to change nappies than their fathers were, or to do the ironing, perhaps while watching football on the television. But they have not changed as fast as the world around them. And that world has not finished changing.
Jobs that reward muscle alone are not coming back, so men will need to pump up their brains instead. Several countries are experimenting with ways to make school more stimulating for children in ways that boys will appreciate. The OECD suggests offering them books they might actually enjoy—about sports stars, perhaps, or dragons. Christina Hoff Sommers of the American Enterprise Institute, a think-tank, suggests giving boys gizmos to fiddle with and more breaks so they can run around outside and let off steam: all helpful, and all things that might be appreciated by girls, too. A greater appreciation of anti-boy bias among teachers would help, as well, as would more men teaching.
Men in the classroom do not just broaden children’s experience; they provide role models doing something both caring and disciplined. Boys need to know that their jobs will not be like those of the sports stars they read about; they also need to know that, energy having been let off in the playground, timeliness and good behaviour matter. Manners maketh man—especially in the service industries.
It is inevitable that more men will earn less than their female partners in years to come. To pull their weight, they will have to do more at home. There are few signs that women want househusbands; but though they don’t want a man who does all the housework they often want one who does more of it. And doing more chores could ultimately make blue-collar men happier, because it would help them forge happy relationships. As the experience of white-collar men shows, more equal unions can be just as rewarding for men as the old-fashioned sort.
When men live with women on more equal terms, they may grow closer to their children. Fathers may find they like being attentive, and it would certainly be good for their kids, especially the boys. As one man whose dad abandoned him lamented on Fathers’ Day in 2008:
“[Fathers] are teachers and coaches. They are mentors and role models. They are examples of success and the men who constantly push us toward it. But if we are honest with ourselves, we’ll admit that what too many fathers also are is missing—missing from too many lives and too many homes. They have abandoned their responsibilities, acting like boys instead of men. And the foundations of our families are weaker because of it.”
The speaker is now president of the United States—plenty of fatherless boys turn out fine. But his point, which is echoed by many more conservative thinkers, is sound. There are many ways to be a man, but not all of them are equally honourable.